The festival of lights....diwali

Diwali, it used to be the most awaited festival of the year , every year, year after year.
It was fun meeting the whole family.A total of 40 cousins, dozen aunts and uncles, couple of grannys and grandpas and yes of course tons of friends...............those from school, college and later even the university.

Spent say in all 23 Diwalis.Of which 5 I didn't pretty much remember anything from.The next 5 my only attraction in Diwali used to be new clothes, lots of fire crackers (which anyways i didn't get many since I was environment friendly and at the same time hell scared of noise of fire crackers right from the time i was a tiny tot!)

So of the 13 that remained, 3 we didn't celebrate in response to respect for deaths in my family.

Sad enough that 3 others, we were on vacation, in various parts of the country.Now considering the fact that only 7 others were left I think 2 of those I have been in USA....therefore haven't celebrated Diwali in the traditional Indian way.Just going to an Indian restaurant for Indian food is the kind of celebration we've had here.
Here we are just 5 Diwalis that I had spent in the traditional style with family and friends.I am sure of those I remember just 1 which was one and the only time 30 members of my family travelled to northern Maharashtra, Chandrapur and celebrated diwali together.That was an awesome fun time....................

I don't feel sad anymore that I am not with my family for Diwali this year because when I thought about all this and disected the facts right I realized that I haven't really celebrated Diwali much even when I was in India, with everyone due to one reason or the other.

Nevertheless the heart longs to return home and keeps complaining of having missed the festive times.But the brain holds it back, tells it to shut up and think. Heart dear can never think.What can I say if only we'd have just one of the two ...either the heart or the brain ...life wouldn't be so confusing.Whatsay????????